Being stuck in the past is like walking forward with your back facing the front, you'll always miss out on what's right in front of you.

It's days like this, where I completely reflect on life. Whether it's sat on a bus looking out watching daily the winter slowly dawning upon us, the condensation increasing up the window glass in the state of mind of day dreaming. Everyone else becoming invisible, a complete blur as the music flows and vibrates in to your ears.
or it's just laying in bed, that crucial moment when everything is silent, complete darkness surrounding you. Flashbacks of memories occurring, the sub-conscious mind creating the up most desires and impossible dreams that you only briefly remember when you wake.

I love reflecting back. The moments when I was most happy, to the moments where I had to stop, think and learn from my actions or what my actions would create/cause if I followed them.
I realised I spent such an amount of time, dwelling on the past, listening to others, rather than the thoughts of my own, searching and trying to learn more things about myself, while under going different situations and over-coming obstacles. I was always focusing on the 'what if's' rather than in the moment of the time, thinking and sparing other people feelings over mine, making my happiness disappear. I started to learn that I was having more 'down' days than I was having 'good' days.
I was giving my time and effort to the wrong people who couldn't even spare the slightest feeling's of mine. Always at a constant battle with myself, telling myself it wouldn't happen again, I'd give my time wisely to the people who deserved it.
But what's better than seeing someone else smile? Even if it's only for a short period of time. Seeing their face light up with joy. It gives me such a warm feeling inside. Forgetting all the hatred in this world, all the negative vibes that no matter what you do, people will give off. Creating positivity, a reason for you to smile from cheek to cheek. Sitting back and watching people blossom, creating and achieving goals, filling their lives with aspirations. I feel there isn't anything better than seeing that. Seeing the people around you that you love, be happy.

I use meditation as a way of coping with my depression and it's completely changed my outlook on life as a person. It's taught me not only how to concentrate and try block out all the negativity, but I feel it's made me feel less numb as a person, once believing that I wasn't worth anyone's time, to actually now thinking maybe I am. It's taught me how to handle the more difficult situations in life that you are faced with daily as a person, it's made me even more willing as a person to step out my comfort zone when I never would.

So if you ever have a day where you feel like you don't belong? Stop, think to yourself, tell yourself daily, even if you don't actually believe it, that you ARE worth something, you was put on this earth for a reason, for whatever reason that may be. It might take you years to finally find out.
What's life if you aren't thrown obstacles to get over? Imagine how easy it would be, you wouldn't be able to develop, become stronger, grow.